how is it possible to be such a private person, and yet hate (fear, even) to be alone?

i'm so weird. yes, i am.

i've just been thinking about it a bit, and i've come to the conclusion that i have trouble with relationships. i mean, it's alright with the people i see everyday, but once we've all gone our seperate ways, i realise that i don't put in the effort needed to keep in touch with the people i once spent so much of my time with.

quite sad, really. soon, i'll end up with no friends at all. not a good thought. =(